Too Good Not to Post

Courtesy of dougsploitation and BoingBoing.net

People Will Be Late Today

Thousands of Verizon customers who use their cell phones as alarm clocks will be late for work today after a software update turned off their Samsung u430 phones in the middle of the night. The Samsung u340 is the latest free phone from Verizon, used by budget-conscious consumers everywhere.

Undoubtedly this will increase the volume of speeders and reckless drivers during the mid-morning commute as half-awake people rush to get to school and work, resulting in an abnormally high number of accidents and likely more than one fatality.

Hear that Verizon? FATALITIES!

Six Random Facts About Me

I have been tagged by My Mother.

Rules:
1. Link to the person who tagged you
2. Post the rules on your blog
3. List 6 random facts about yourself
4. Tag 6 people at the end of your post
5. Let each person know they've been tagged by commenting on their blog
6. Let the tagger know the entry is posted on your blog

Facts:
1. My name is James Austin Teal III. If you Google me, this blog is the second result, which is unfortunate.
2. I enjoy art, music and film, and I also enjoy making fun of art, music and film. So don't go see a bad movie with me because I will laugh in the wrong places.
3. I punctuate everything I write, and must spell everything correctly. I do this so well that people pay me to make sure they've done it correctly too. (Well, that's not all I do at work, but I am gaining notoriety as a copy-editor, even though is not in my official job description.)
4. The celebrity I most resemble is probably Hugh Grant, because I am generally affable but occasionally moody and sarcastic, witty, somewhat old-fashioned in many ways and a perennial befuddled bachelor. Also I like tennis.
5. I occasionally leave things unfinished for quite some time, like my website.

Guitar Hero for Christians

Guitar Praise is here! Pre-order your copy now! (Not available for consoles.)

Serious News

From the Onion, Michael Phelps Returns To His Tank At Sea World.

2008 Logo Trends

Via Logo Lounge, 2008 Logo Design Trends.

Recession-Plagued Nation Demands New Bubble To Invest In

From The Onion:

WASHINGTON—A panel of top business leaders testified before Congress about the worsening recession Monday, demanding the government provide Americans with a new irresponsible and largely illusory economic bubble in which to invest.

"What America needs right now is not more talk and long-term strategy, but a concrete way to create more imaginary wealth in the very immediate future," said Thomas Jenkins, CFO of the Boston-area Jenkins Financial Group, a bubble-based investment firm. "We are in a crisis, and that crisis demands an unviable short-term solution."

the whole story

Tornado Hits Farmington

Well, my friend Dan finally got the "Tornadeous Nimbus" clouds he always wanted. It wasn't too bad -- mostly downed trees, flattened corn fields and one overturned tractor-trailer. Too bad he didn't get to see it, but at least he had a couple of downed trees to cheer him up. I left work early on Thursday to help him clean up, but I didn't take any pictures (sorry). Instead, here are some unusually small news photos from the Farmington Independent.

Obama = Bush

Job News

I have been made a full-time employee at one of the places where I was freelancing for the past couple months. Sorry I'm not going to post where this place is, because in my experience, blogging about anything work-related, whether good or bad, is not a good idea. Suffice to say, I'm contracting on-site for a large discount retailer. This means I can de-bookmark Craigslist, and never ever go there again! (Woo-hoo!)

MNDOT strikes again!

What in the world is wrong with the Minnesota Department of Transportation? I have driven thousands of miles of Interstate and I have NEVER seen ANY interstate highway completely shut down for resurfacing. What normally happens is they close one lane, resurface it, open it back up, close the other lane, resurface that one, then open it up again. Thanks to them, I didn't get to church Sunday morning. I wasn't late -- I couldn't even get out of the city!

Let's see how many ways MNDOT has angered me since I moved here.

1. Wavy roads. (I-90 westbound when you first enter the state.)
2. Snow accumulation that doesn't get plowed for hours, if at all.
3. Potholes big enough swallow up small cars. This could be one reason why Minnesota has more trucks than cars or vans.
4. Bridges that randomly fall in the river. (Well, one so far.)
5. Unmarked highway entrances.
6. Randomly closed highway entrances.
7. Poorly planned roads that spawn HUGE traffic jams, turning a 15-minute commute into an hour-long ordeal.
8. Northbound highway entrances with no corresponding southbound entrance.
9. Westbound highway entrances with no corresponding eastbound entrance.
10. Abnormally narrow lanes.

All in all, it's the worst state I've ever driven in. It's almost as bad as driving in Canada.

21 less-than-obvious ways to save the planet

There are many ways to save the planet. One recent planet-saving fad has been replacing traditional incandescent light bulbs with more energy-efficient compact fluorescent bulbs. But there are many far-less obvious and just as important planet-saving methods. Here are a few:

1. Go to bed as soon as it gets dark out. It should save you a bundle on electricity.
2. Use the stairs instead of the elevator. It's good exercise! 30 floors isn't that much! It takes a lot of energy to move that box up and down. Of course, you can always elevator-pool to save energy.
   
3. Drink tap water instead of bottled. It takes a lot of CO2 to get that stuff from Fiji!
4. Walk or bike to work! It's not THAT far.
5. Replace your electric guitar with an acoustic one. The less you have to plug in the better.
   
6. Read a book instead of watching TV. It must not be a new book, however. Those require trees to be cut down.
   
7. Hum instead of listening to the radio. If you really need to hear music, walk to the grocery store. They usually have music playing there.
   
8. Get your pizza delivered instead of picking it up. The delivery guy is going out anyway. You might as well save the fuel in your own vehicle.
9. Move to a warm climate. You'll save money by having no heating bills in the winter. (Air conditioning is for wusses).
10. Shorten your commute by moving closer to where you work. Bonus if you can work from home, or live in the same building as where you work.
    
11. Skip a meal a few times a week. Calories are energy too!
    
12. Send an email instead of writing a letter. (Use someone else's computer so you don't have to turn yours on.)
13. Watch church on TV instead of driving to one. You don't talk to anyone anyways, so why not? Bonus if you can watch it on someone else's TV. Radio is acceptable too.
14. Sleep as often as you can. You won't be needing the lights or appliances, and you can save on food by sleeping through mealtimes!
15. Grow a garden! Build a rainwater collector to irrigate it, so you don't have to use tap water. Freeze what you can't eat so there is no waste.
16. Eat whatever you can raw. That way you save the electricity you'd normally use cooking your food. If you need to cook something, find some dead leaves and twigs in your yard and burn them to cook your food.
    
17. Replace your electric alarm clock with a mechanical alarm clock, if you can still find one.
18. Live in a city. Cities consume less energy per person than small towns. Plus, they often have public transportation, which is a great way to meet people.
19. Don't be poor. Poor people often can't afford to adopt planet-saving habits. Remember, saving money is not the same as saving the planet! Saving the planet requires all of us to make financial sacrifices. You can't make financial sacrifices if you are poor.
20. Don't own any unnecessary animals, like chameleons, monkeys or cats. Dogs are okay only if they help you catch food so you don't have to drive to the store.
21. Die. Dying saves the planet by eliminating the CO2 emitted providing you with sustenance as well as preventing any further CO2 emission via respiration. Additionally, you restore vital nutrients to the soil. Bonus for dying before you get the chance to reproduce.
    

Sunset on Mars

Very cool. And not from BBC News.

UPDATE: High-res version here (like for computer desktop backgrounds)

Brigitte Bardot no longer that hot

Apparently Brigitte Bardot has been fined for "for inciting racial hatred". According to BBC News, "She was prosecuted over a letter published on her website that complained Muslims were 'destroying our country by imposing their ways'." My, my! What would Charles Martel say? Well I have to defend her because a mistrust of foreigners is typically part of a nationalistic attitude in almost any nation. (It just happens to be illegal in France.) I don't think it "incites hatred".

Here in America, it is not illegal to say such things, but Muslims certainly do not "impose their ways" here in St. Paul; they just wear Islamic clothes, speak Islamic languages, eat Islamic foods and publish Islamic newspapers. The history of America is full of immigrants who came here and were vilified by the resident population. Italians, Irish, Germans, Chinese -- all have become an inextricable part of American culture. But it is perfectly natural to want to protect the culture you know, even if that means excluding others. It's not hatred, it's just opinion.

Obama / Hillary '08

Apparently Ms. Clinton is "open" to being Obama's VP candidate. It may be a handy way for Obama to clinch the November election, but if I were him I think I'd get some extra security guards. And not sit next to the VP while eating. And hide behind her during public appearances.

Isolated tribe spotted in Brazil

A previously undiscovered tribe of native Americans has been discovered in the Amazon rainforest. Looks like they're pretty "primitive". They even tried to kill with bows and arrows the airplane that took pictures of them, which I think is pretty gangsta. Do we have any volunteers to catch them up on the last 6,000 years of human history? You must be disease-free and have really good people skills. Here's the story. Here's some pictures.

Kids' wishes for a better planet

Kids' wishes for a better planet
From BoingBoing.net

News Flash for Hugo Chavez!

We do whatever we want, and there's not much you can can do about it. Sorry if that causes you to lose a little sleep at night. Should have thought about that before you decided to become our enemy.

Disturbing News

Wildlife populations 'plummeting'
This means that all the articles I read in the 90's about such-and-such a species "making a comeback" are lies, and Conservationism is a lost cause. That or this article is pure propaganda. Oh wait, look at that chart at the bottom!

Obese blamed for the world's ills
Draw your own conclusion from this one.

Minnesota Public Radio Turns Conservative?

Well, not really. It's just they're so busy opposing Republican policy that they haven't noticed it shifting to the left.
Youtube Video

Top Gear Takes on the U.S.

Is it real, or is it hyperbole? You be the judge.

Part I.


Part II.

Tata buys Jaguar

An Indian corporation buys a British brand. My, how the tables have turned.
(You know, because India was a British colony and they used to export a lot of stuff from India to Great Britain and now it's like "India is buying British companies" but actually Ford owns Jaguar and it's not really built in the UK anymore so it's not really a British company, it's a British brand. Yeah, I just thought it was interesting.)

Font Watch!

It looks like one of the fonts I discovered almost two years ago has finally made it big. Perhaps I have a knack for discovering great fonts. Maybe I'll make it a feature on my new design blog (open soon).

Santana Shreds

Some guy overdubs a Santana concert video with awful guitar. If you don't understand why this is funny, you are truly missing out. It's the funniest thing I've seen in a long time.
Youtube Video

Hey, Fellow Designers!

Stop working 50-60 hours a week and give some of your work to me. I don't want to starve just so you can take home a little extra every week. It's not fair. Let's take care of each other!

Tytler Cycle

"A democracy is always temporary in nature; it simply cannot exist as a permanent form of government. A democracy will continue to exist up until the time that voters discover that they can vote themselves generous gifts from the public treasury. From that moment on, the majority always votes for the candidates who promise the most benefits from the public treasury, with the result that every democracy will finally collapse due to loose fiscal policy, which is always followed by a dictatorship."

"The average age of the world's greatest civilizations from the beginning of history has been about 200 years. During those 200 years, these nations always progressed through the following sequence:

• From bondage to spiritual faith;
• From spiritual faith to great courage;
• From courage to liberty;
• From liberty to abundance;
• From abundance to complacency;
• From complacency to apathy;
• From apathy to dependence;
• From dependence back into bondage."

I can't confirm who this quote/quotes are from, but I've seen them together before, and I think it's absolutely true. What do you think? Where are we in this cycle?

Vote for Obama!

Obama Magic 8 Ball!

Ask it your questions and get no answers!

Wanted: Cheap Flash Designer

I find postings like this somewhat hilarious. A Flash developer for $10/hr? Sure, in India maybe. Ha ha ha ha ha!!

Sub-Prime Mortgage Crisis, Explained

This is actually quite accurate, and is exactly why the government shouldn't bail out the economy every time a recession threatens. Let the sowers reap, and everyone will be a little smarter.

My Next Car

If everything goes well, I might get one of these in the fall.

Me, Explained

This is almost exactly what I'm like when nobody is around.

Barbershoppe Illusionne Part Deux

Using your headphones again, challenge yourself by completing a series of tests for the Swedish Armed Forces.

Eagan Hills Church

I found out tonight when I went to a dessert social at our pastor's house that our church's sermons are "podcasted". I thought some of my family and friends might like to hear a little sample of what Pastor Bruce Konold's sermons are like, so I've posted a few links to some recent messages on the book of Acts. Pastor Bruce is an intelligent, articulate and scholarly man who is devoted to teaching the whole Word of God. Much like my former pastor at Calvary Chapel of Webster, his sermons are chapter by chapter, verse by verse. I have very much enjoyed (to the extent that you "enjoy" sermons) his exposition of the story of Stephen, the first martyr. I think they represent a good example of his preaching style. Here are the mp3's of the series:

Stephen, First Martyr for Christ
Part 1: Stephen's Character Midst Opposition, Acts 6:8-15
Part 2: Stephen's Defense Before the Sanhedrin, Acts 7:1-53
Part 3: Stephen's Death, Acts 7:54-60

More sermons are posted here.

Barbershoppe Illusionne (Headphones required)

Youtube Video

Stuff White Democrats Like

Actually the title of the blog is "Stuff White People Like", but it's really talking about white Democrats. A few of these apply to me though.

I'm Comic Sans!

Don't worry, it just means I don't take myself too seriously. Any number of fonts could suit my personality.

Good, Better, Best in Minneapolis

Since I've been in the Twin-Cities looking for a job for a while, I've gotten to know a little about the local design industry. Design is thriving here! (which may be why it's been difficult to find a job, with so much great competition). Here's a few of my findings.

Good
These guys do above-average work for some of the bigger names in town.
   Compass Design
   Berg Design Company
   ImageWerks Marketing
   Linnihan Foy Advertising
   StoneArch Creative

Better
These firms have a more engaging design style that seems to indicate some better talent and perhaps some better clients.
   Plaudit Design
   Nelson-Anderson
   Design Center Inc.
   Grossman Design Associates
   MarketingLab

Best
The top firms in Minneapolis are the designer's designers. Their talent is superb and their work is mesmerizing. They service the biggest names in town and many other successful companies from around the world. It's very difficult to get into these places without a pedigree (meaning a degree from a top design school or at least an excellent portfolio and references).
   Mono
   Wolfmotell
   Charles S. Anderson
   Wink
   Duffy & Partners

Granted, some of this is conjecture -- I don't really know too much about these companies, but this is the impression I get based on what I've seen and read. You might like one of my lower-ranked firm's style better than one of the higher. It all depends on your taste. If I had my choice of where to find employment, I'd aim right for the middle.

Disturbing News

Lone Conservative Republican candidate Mitt Romney drops out of presidential race, presumably because he's afraid of going against Hillary.

The Archbishop of Canterbury believes Sharia law will emerge in the UK.

Lawrence Welk stars sing a song about pot.

Oh yeah, the Cold War is making a comeback.

Divide & Conquer?

It occurred to me today that this year's Republican candidates each appeal to a completely different and equally important segment of the Republican party. To those in the military, the obvious choice is McCain, a Vietnam war hero. To the religious right, the obvious choice is Huckabee, a former Baptist minister who wears his Christianity on his sleeve. To conservatives, the only choice is Mitt Romney, whose economic policies are the least likely to lead this country deeper into debt and economic recession. It's got me wondering who the good guy is, or if this division is somehow intentional.

It is comforting to know however, that the Democratic party is also divided on their choice of candidates.

And one thing is certain, more people are paying attention to this race than any other presidential race in recent history. Primaries and caucuses had record attendances on Tuesday. And my best friend just became a Republican delegate.

Interview Questions

I had an actual job interview today in downtown Minneapolis. It was my first real on-site job interview, made more exciting by the fact that it was in the big city on the upper floors of a pretty tall skyscraper. One of the questions they asked me was "What are your strengths and weaknesses?" I was expecting the question, but I admit I wasn't sure how to answer. If you know me, what do you think my strengths and weaknesses are? How should one answer this question?

A Celebration of Darkness

Nope, it's not Halloween. Today is a post about the wonderful light-absorbing material recently made by researchers at Rensselaer Polytechnic Institute in Troy, New York. It is three times darker than the previous standard for black. Made of carbon nanotubes, it absorbs 99.9% of all light. Unfortunately for Matrix fans, it is probably too expensive to make a trench coat out of.

Reuters
BBC News

Global Warming Strikes Again!

In case you didn't know, all unusual meteorological phenomena is now being attributed to global warming. This means "unseasonable" or "unusual" heat, cold, rainfall, drought, wind, hail, snow, flies, locusts, frogs, or any other element we usually associate with "weather". Presumably it also includes this example of snow in Baghdad, although oddly enough, global warming is never mentioned in the article.

CSS = FAIL

CSS is to web designers what 9/11 is to Rudy Giuliani -- it's like the answer to everything. In actuality though, it's turning out to be a huge pain.

Okay so here's my issue. I'm working on a web design project, the first one I've done since college. I downloaded a trial version of DreamWeaver CS3 which is working AWESOMELY -- I like it SO much better than my lousy MX 2002 student version. Only one thing isn't working that well -- my links aren't behaving right. And I can't fix them. Well i can, but it's needlessly complicated.

See my blog? how there are different links and they're all different colors and when you put your mouse over them they turn into other different colors, and sometimes when you click on them they change colors again? All that is accomplished with CSS (short for Cascading Style Sheets).

Styles are great things for print designers like me. Basically they work by formatting large blocks of text all at once. Say you're designing a newsletter or something, and you want all your headlines, subheads, body copy, and captions to have the same look. What you do is set up some styles, you know:

Headlines, subheads, body copy, captions

So once you have your styles set up, to apply a style you just select your text, select your style, and click "Apply Style". At least that's how it works in a page layout program. In DreamWeaver it works basically the same way -- very user friendly, only instead of clicking "Apply Style" you select your "Class" (a CSS style that can be applied to multiple objects) from a drop-down menu.

Now the awesome thing about HTML is it's hyper-text. That means you can link to other pages or objects on the Internet from the page you are writing. Back in the day, all links were the same color: blue. And all visited links were the same color: purple. Google still follows this convention.

But not everybody can use default colors. What if all the text on your website was blue? The links wouldn't stand out very well. It would be great if you could make your links, say, orange or something. The "link", "alink", and "vlink" attributes were invented to make this possible. Placed in the <body> tag, they change the colors of links, active links, and visited links, respectively throughout the whole page.

But what if you don't want all the links on your page to be the same color? What if you want the links on the blue background to be light blue, and the links on the white background to be brown? CSS makes that possible.

But how?

I don't know how. That's my problem. I want all the links in the body copy to have the same link color, all the text in the sidebar to have a different link color, and all the text in the footer to have another color. You'd think you'd be able to define your link colors when you define your style, since in the mind of the designer the two are inextricably linked, but you can't. Your style is a "class", and the link behavior is a "pseudo-class". The two are apparently only loosely connected, if at all. What I need to figure out is how to link the two together.

(A side note, using the <font> tag only solves the problem in IE, not in Firefox and DEFINITELY not in Safari.)

What do I do?

Indian Sports Car

Meet the Tata Indica V2 Turbo, a sport compact from India with a whopping 70 hp! Now with anti-lock brakes and airbags! Speed meets safety!

So what if it seems underpowered? I guess it's kind of appropriate for a country with no traffic lights.

What am I doing up at 3:30 am? Why, installing a trial version of DreamWeaver CS3, of course!

Quiz: Famous or Unknown Artist?

Try this quiz to test your expert art-critiquing eye. Which paintings are by famous artists, and which are not?

Sorry, you won't be able to beat my score of 100% -- the same score I got on my Art History final in college. :-)

Courtesy of Coudal Partners blended feed.

13 Things I Did in 2007 for the First Time

2007 was chock-full of new experiences, but I haven't counted them all yet. I'm sure there was at least 13. Let's see....

1. Early in the year, I drove a hundred miles an hour for the first time.
2. Then, I learned how to downhill ski. (A tip for those who are thinking of doing this -- learning to turn is more important than learning to stop.) Thanks, Emily.
3. Then in the spring, I went rock-climbing. Thanks, Emily.
4. In July, for the first time, my employment was terminated by my employer (unless you count the paper route). Getting laid off led to even more new experiences!
5. I bought an iMac to build my portfolio and just in case I had to freelance for a while. Yes, it was my first Mac.
6. Later in July, I visited my grandma who lives deep in Canadian country -- Halifax, Nova Scotia.
7. I saw a moose on the way there.
8. Also on the way there, we witnessed a robbery. (They took off in a white Kia Amanti.)
9. And I called the police. (Actually, I called the police about a drunk driver -- not the robbery. Someone else talked to the police about the robbery.)
10. I went wading in the North Atlantic. (A tip for those who are thinking of doing this -- keep moving or you will freeze!)
11. In August, I drove myself all the way to Minnesota!
12. I decided to try living there for a while.
13. I traded my sporty Acura RSX for a used pick-up truck.
14. I had to learn how to drive a manual transmission.
15. In October, I went up to the North Woods on a scouting trip.
16. I shot clay pigeons with a 12-gauge.
17. I drank a whole beer -- but not on the scouting trip. (A tip for those who are thinking of doing this -- your body can metabolize approximately one beer every hour. Remember this and you can stay quite sober.)
18. I had a job interview. Yes, it was my first job interview, a phone interview with a guy in Texas.
19. I got a temp job to make some money. Woo-hoo! Ten bucks an hour!
20. I moved into an apartment to get rid of some of that extra money I had lying around. Woo-hoo! My own place!
21. I went to a Halloween party. Yes, it was my first Halloween party.
22. Finally, when I went home for Christmas, I saw my first nephew for the first time.

I think that covers most of it. 2008 is sure to be another exciting year. Why, just the other day I saw a Harry Potter movie for the first time. I still have a lot to learn and do this year. Maybe this will be the year I get engaged, or even get a girlfriend! Maybe I will join a rock band, or move to the big city! Maybe I'll get in a car accident, or a plane crash! Maybe I'll come up with a great idea that will make enough money for me to be set for life! Maybe I'll develop some real ambition and discipline! Yes, it's sure to be another exciting year.

Humans to reach 'physiological limits by 2060'

According to a French study published in the Daily Telegraph, humans are reaching their peak physical performance, and progressively fewer athletic records are likely to be broken.

I predict (and advocate) a future steroid class of athletic events, where performance-enhancing drugs are legalized, and the resulting records set will be truly super-human. I'd personally like to see just how far someone can throw the javelin, or how fast someone can run 100 meters. Of course, the baseball fields will have to be twice as long.

Lung cancer linked to lack of sunshine?

Scientists have discovered a link between the lung cancer rates in a given country and the distance that country is from the equator. Article

Except that I wonder to myself if there isn't more of a link between amount of time spent indoors and lung cancer. In other words, people farther from the equator spend more time indoors. And people who breathe more fresh air are less likely to get lung cancer. That makes more sense to me...

Prove There Is A God

Atheist: Prove there is a God.

Believer: Prove there is a sun.

Atheist (sneers): What do you mean? Of course there is a sun. It sustains all life on this planet.

Believer: Where is the sun?

Atheist: It's in the sky.

Believer: So if I go outside right now and look up in the sky, I'll see the sun?

Atheist: Well, not right now. It's night. The sun's on the other side of the world.

Believer: So I have to wait until daytime?

Atheist: Yes.

Believer: Interesting. So if I go outside tomorrow and it's cloudy and raining, I'll see the sun.

Atheist: No, you have to wait until the sky clears up.

Believer: Sometimes that takes a long time. So when the sky clears, can I look anywhere in the sky and see the sun?

Atheist: No, you have to be looking at the sun in order to see it.

Believer: So I have turn and face the sun in order to see it?

Atheist: Well, even if you are looking away from the sun there are shadows that indicate a large brilliant light source.

Believer: What if I have my eyes closed?

Atheist: You have to have your eyes open to see the sun.

Believer: There sure are a lot of rules to follow to see the sun, which you claim is the sustainer of all life on Earth. You're telling me I have wait until it's daytime, and while there are no clouds to obscure the view, walk outside and look in the sky, facing the direction of the sun, with my eyes open.

Atheist: Yes. It might be hard for you to understand...

Believer: It seems the sun is a lot more elusive than God in my experience.

Atheist: What do you mean?

Believer: If I go outside right now, and keeping my eyes open, say to the sun, "Show yourself to me!", will it turn the night into day, part the clouds and stop the rain, and turn me in the right direction to face it?

Atheist: No.

Believer: God will.

Death By Powerpoint

| View | Upload your own

How many boring (boorish?) Powerpoint presentations have you sat through? Don't you wish there was a way to make all that data into a dynamic, interactive multimedia presentation? Think Flash is going to solve your problems? Well, you don't need to know complicated software to make a compelling presentation. What you do need is (ta-dah!!!) compelling content. Here is an example by presentation consultant, Alexei Kapterev. (Yes, I know it's a Flash presentation, by there is no animation involved.)

As a designer, I've helped many people make their Powerpoint presentations more interesting by using animation strategically, but how much simpler would it be if they just followed the model shown here?

I Love the Holidays

Look what I found -- Christmas cards for atheists! (FYI, I am not an atheist, which makes these simultaneously funny and offensive.)
Oh well -- gotta serve somebody.

I Love My Apartment

This is a hole, about 6 feet long, 2 feet wide, and 5 feet deep. It, along with seven or eight of its friends, was created this morning while I was trying to sleep. It is literally right outside my door (I actually stood in the doorway while I took this picture.) I guess this type of thing is going to go on until Saturday. My landlord is a really nice guy, but i think he owes his tenants who work second shift a couple of free nights at a motel.

I Love My Job (cont.)

Today I stuffed 1563 envelopes! And some of them went to Webster, NY!! And two of them went to Ontario!!! Wow!!!!

I Love My Job

Today I stuffed envelopes, 1400 of them! That's 200 more than quota!
I am awesome!

I Love Facebook

I gave them my sex, date of birth, and zip code, but I couldn't get them to accept my street address. Should I give them the real one?

Global Freshwater Shortage?

It sounds crazy to me, but apparently that stuff that falls from the sky is in short supply. The newspaper says so.

If you stop and think about it, barring a literal astronomical catastrophe, a global drought is a bit of an impossibility. But then I'm just an average guy who hasn't studied the numbers. I should just let the experts do the hand-wringing. (For the record, I first read about this "crisis" in Ranger Rick magazine... when I was eight.)

How to make $10 million

I am SO there when Facebook goes public. They routinely sell out of these little "gifts". It's brilliant.

My Portfolio

A short version of my portfolio is now online. Check it out at: http://jimtealdesigner.com/portfolio.pdf

UK Speeder Gets Jail

From reading a lot of car magazines, I have picked up on a bit of the auto-enthusiast culture, and I can tell you for sure that this man is a hero to some. What do you think? Is a 172 mph speeding ticket a badge of honor? (I've never driven faster than 110.)
Jail for 172mph Porsche motorist (BBC)

Ch-ch-ch-changes

Pardon the David Bowie allusion. It's the best I could do so late.

Since becoming unemployed at the beginning of July, I have thought a lot about where I would like to go and what I want to do. I am 25, single, renting space from my grandparents, have few major commitments in the Rochester area, and have entertained the idea of leaving the state for quite some time. I think I'm pretty good at what I do, and I'm pretty sure that if I had the chance, I could make a decent living as a designer.

After some thought, I narrowed the alternatives down to a few: I could get a job at a local design firm where I would likely find myself in the same situation a few years down the road. I could look for a job in one of the major design hot-spots around the country (New York, Chicago, Seattle, Atlanta) where jobs are plentiful but I wouldn't know anyone. I could go to a city out-of-state where I know people (Nashville, Albuquerque, Minneapolis, Pensacola) but the economic climate might be better, the same, or worse. Or I could get a temporary job in Rochester working part-time, probably for a sign company or print shop, and go to school at RIT and learn the web programming stuff that designers are pretty much required to know (despite it having little to do with design and not being included in most college-level graphic design programs).

So that leads me to now. Two and a half months later I am planning to move halfway across the country to Minneapolis, where my best friend moved in 11th grade, and where there are more and better design jobs than here in Rochester, NY. I am working with a temp agency, with a tentative start date of October 1st, if they can place me by then. I have traded my sports car for a pickup truck that I can fill with all my stuff. My scheduled departure time is my 26th birthday, September 24th. I don't know what the future holds, but I firmly believe that I need this kind of a drastic change in my life in order to progress and to grow as a person. I really can't explain it any more than that. It will be hard to leave my family and friends, but that's why I have to do it. It's probably comparable to when a guy joins the military -- it's about leaving behind the familiar comforts of home and trekking out on his own, becoming the person you know is inside and... well I'm getting all philosophical. Anyways, I'm running out of money and the options are dwindling. This seems like the best thing to do. I'll have another update someday, maybe in a few weeks.

Climate Change and Red Meat Linked

Just in case you had any doubts about the link between liberal ideology and global warming.
Eating less meat could slow climate change, experts say

Under Construction

As you can tell, my blog is currently undergoing a major remodel. I don't know how long it will take to complete.

Nova Scotia Photos

I have already edited and captioned all of my good vacation photos on Facebook. No point in doing it twice. Visit my album here:
Nova Scotia Photos

Peggys Cove, Nova Scotia

Taken on Sunday evening.

Some Cool Videos

Ultimate Canon Rock (JerryC arrangement played by 40 different guitarists)


Will it Blend? -- iPhone

What accent do you have?

What American accent do you have? (Best version so far) Northern You have a Northern accent. That could either be the Chicago/Detroit/Cleveland/Buffalo accent (easily recognizable) or the Western New England accent that news networks go for.

Click Here to Take This Quiz Brought to you by YouThink.com quizzes and personality tests.

Ban Comic Sans?

Hey, like my new typeface? Apparently there's this whole group of people who want to want to ban this overused Microsoft creation. I checked out their website bancomicsans.com, and it seems like they're pretty serious. They say it undermines the rules of typography or something like that. I say it's just a bit overused. Just like Papyrus, or Brushscript, or Copperplate Gothic.

I think I'll stick to Helvetica if I have to use an overused font.

Kellogg's to phase out cartoon characters

Yes, this is a marketing post. I hope to have more of them now that I'm reading more marketing and design news. Anyways, here's the scoop. Apparently, Kellogg's is phasing out their cartoon characters on their sugary cereals, on account of them not wanting to attract kids to unhealthy food (anymore). Here's the link:

Kellogg to Phase Out Some Food Ads to Children

My thought is, if cartoon characters were so successful at marketing unhealthy food (although one could argue kids like it because it tastes good), why can't they market healthy food with cartoon characters! I can see it now, on Saturday morning cartoons. "Hey kids, it's me, Marvin the monkey, reminding you to eat bananas every day! It's part of this complete breakfast!"

Seneca Foods Makes National Headlines

Hooray for Seneca Foods, a processing plant located about 5 miles or so south of where I grew up. They are the latest food processing company to have something strange appear in one of their products. I bet someone is going to get "canned" for this.

Snake head found in green beans (Warning: There is a photo.)

In the meantime, I think I will continue to eat frozen vegetables.

Blog 2.0

As you can see, I've changed my template. Further modifications are imminent, although they might not happen for another year or so.

Oklahoma State What?

Okay this is too funny not to blog. Oklahoma has a new state vegetable, and it is DA-DA-DAHH!! the watermelon. Ha ha ha ha ha....

The Story from the Houston Chronicle.

For the record, a vegetable is any part of the plant we eat that does not grow from a flower and is not a seed. Eg. carrots (roots), celery (stem), lettuce (leaves). I imagine though, that Oklahomans grow a lot of stuff and they know what they're talking about, so I'll give them the benefit of the doubt. How much do you have to love watermelon to make it the state vegetable? It boggles my mind...

A reminder

This is a reminder (to myself) to do my taxes. Or go to jail.

Blogging is Dead

And in honor of this momentus occasion, I have posted this fine picture of a dead tree. It was once a tall, strong tree. Now it has been dead for a very long time. Actually, my blog has been neglected lately because of two reasons: 1) I haven't been going online very often anymore because my computer at work died, and 2) When I do go online, it's usually too short of a time to post anything. Now I'm at home paying bills online, so I am posting. I don't know when I will post again.

BB King anyone?

I have tickets to see BB King at the Auditorium Theatre this Friday at 7:30 pm, if anyone wants to go with me. It should be a very family-friendly show, I mean the guys like 82 years old right? For those who don't know, BB King is one of the last great bluesmen still hangin' around. He is well-regarded among professional guitarists.

Tomorrow will be a whole month since my last pos.... oh-noooooooo!

Snowball Weather

This weekend has been perfect snowball fight weather, because the snowballs pack together tightly, but still explode on impact. I should have a picture to illustrate here....

Another post! Two in one day!

So this daily Internet comic is vulgar sometimes but occasionally it's really funny.

Hello again.

I'm back from vacation! I haven't been posting but I've been reading most of the blogs in my links section, so I want you all to know that I still love you even though you are not on facebook.
Actually I wasn't on vacation.

Pickles Today

Finally someone speaks the truth! This is going on my wall.

'Tis the Season

I counted no less than 39 Playstation 3's for sale in our local classifieds today. Some even had the audacity to claim that they were "hard to find".

Important Blogging News

Most people who will start a blog already have, and many have become bored and moved on. I wonder if this study includes computer-generated blogs filled with random content?

Public Service Announcement

Puppies sold as so-called "designer hybrids" are actually mutts. (eg. Cocka-poo, Yorkie-poo, Labradoodle, etc.) I wouldn't pay any more for these animals than I would for a non-pedigree dog. I've noticed an increasing number of these in the classifieds recently. As you can imagine, some pretty inventive names for these types of "breeds" have arisen. What's the funniest "designer hybrid" dog breed you can think of?

Would you use a dollar coin?

Having learned something from the state quarter phenomenon, the U.S. Mint has decided to manufacture yet another version of the dollar coin. They are hoping these coins, which will feature each of the U.S. presidents, will do what Susan B. Anthony and Sacagawea couldn't, which is make Americans use dollar coins instead of paper money. Here's why I think this latest effort will be unsuccessful.
1. Metal is much more expensive than paper, even though it lasts longer.
2. Vending machines do not take them, except for stamp machines.
3. They don't slide nicely in and out of a wallet.
4. There is no tray for them in the cash register.
5. They are heavy.
6. They are noisy.
7. They are unfamiliar.
8. They are unnecessary.
9. They are Canadian.
10. We already use dollar coins, called "four quarters".

Caption This Photograph

University of California, Los Angeles anthropology students Bob Walters (left) and Frank Higgins creatively interpret Neanderthal behavior before a delighted lunchtime crowd.

Concert Tickets Announcement

I will be receiving in the mail three tickets to see Wayne Watson, Kim Hill, and Phil Keaggy in concert at Crosswinds Wesleyan (or is it just Crosswinds, Priscilla?) on Dec. 8 at 7:00 pm. I will obviously be using one of them myself (if I can get out of work early enough). I figure several people would want to go too... any takers? Tickets are General Admission ($15.00).

Happy Birthday, Ben!

Ben is a teenager today. He wants me to post a picture of a "sweet car". Hmmmm... How about this one?
or this one?
The FXX is pretty cool...
Okay, is that enough? No? Alright, one more...

Dead Woman Wins US Election

And yes, she was a Democrat.
Dead woman wins local US election (BBC)

Things that go "CRASH" in the night

Hearing shattering glass in the middle of the night is a good way to double your heart rate in a few seconds, as I found out last night. I was tossing and turning in bed, trying to settle my thoughts and get some sleep when I heard a loud CRASH downstairs. Sometimes I find myself thinking about what I might do if someone broke in at night, but just then I forgot everything about my plans. I started to head toward the stairs, knocking over an old art project (of Aunt Priscilla's), making a lot of noise. Then I realized I didn't have my glasses on so I stumbled back across the room to get those. Then I thought I should probably look out my window to the driveway to see if I could see anyone. I didn't. Then I heard Grandma and Grandpa shuffling around so I figured I better get some pants on before I went downstairs. I crossed the room again to find some PJ's to put on, but my light was off, so I turned it on and remembered my curtain was open, so my neighbors could see right in if they were in their backyard (and vice versa). I shut my light off and closed the curtain, before turning the light on again and fishing around in a laundry basket for some pants. By the time I got downstairs, Grandma had already gone back to bed and Grandpa was cleaning up the glass... from an old Diane Dengel print that had fallen off the bathroom wall. Funny, we never noticed the frame starting to come apart through years of exposure to the humidity of the bathroom. I'm sure there's an object lesson here somewhere....

Joyeaux Halloween!

Or not. Has evil lost its universal appeal? How can this be?

To do list:

Beat Need for Speed Hot Pursuit 2....check
Beat Need for Speed Underground....check
Beat Need for Speed Most Wanted....getting there
Beat Tony Hawk Pro Skater 3....almost
Design Dad's business cards....getting there
Design Dad's logo....check
Redesign blog....haven't started

I am enjoying a new laptop I purchased from my friend, Tim. It runs just about every game I've tried fabulously, and it has a DVD player and I have been wasting a considerable amount of time on it. The good news is I still get out every night just about, so I as of today I still have a life.

A Long Time From Now....

What do you think Earth will be like in 10,000 years (presuming it still exists and is inhabitable)? Here's a bit of Sci-Fi from a London evolutionary theorist: Human species 'may split in two'. Of course, it's nonsense, but it's still kind of fun to think about. I propose that the dominant species will be short, ugly, and incredibly intelligent, and that the subservient species will be tall, strong, and good-looking by today's standards, but very stupid. The trolls will use them as beasts of burden. Moo!

Uh... this week has been pretty busy. Look for a site redesign before month's end.

Very Important News

Looks like nothing is going on in the world today.
A Pig Has Piglets... Again!

Castle Retreat 2006

retreat [ri-treet] noun
a place where devoted Christians go to take cold showers and sleep on camp mattresses, hoping to get closer to God

This was my first time going on the Calvary Chapel of Webster Castle Retreat, so I wasn't really sure what to expect. I guess I am still processing the spiritual side of it, so all I have to offer right now is a few pictures and observations. Enjoy!

The "castle" isn't so much of a castle as it is a giant stone farmhouse. Inside, very little of the original decorative details are left. Instead is a hodge-podge of country style decorations, donated furniture, and assorted found objects.


Some examples of found objects in my room: a picture of Jesus on a log...


...and a portrait of President Woodrow Wilson.


A bit of righteous vandalism.


The hillside location offered some spectacular views, like this one from the terrace.


And this one from the Prayer Tower.


A gorgeous sunset delayed our Thursday evening study.


Friday afternoon, I took a walk up the hill to the chapel.


On the way down, I found this little bit of wildlife.


Another view of the steps looking down to the... wait, is that an exotic car lurking in the bushes?


Only one company designs cars with such distinctive stying.


Would now be a good time to learn how to drive stick?

Moniker Design is looking old. Time to update! Look for a new site design sometime next week.

The Dating Pool

I have decided, at the ripe old age of 25, to enter the dating "pool", that is, as of now I am actively seeking a life partner. I guess you could say I'm "wading" for a mate. Aha aha. Of course I've seen a lot of people "drown", but I am certain it is better to be hurt in a relationship than to never have one at all. Hmmm... I'm not sure how far I can carry this pool metaphor. Anyways, I never quite been able to understand the process; there's a whole lot of things I can do better and I'm afraid anything I try is going to make me feel silly. Any friendly helpful suggestions?

It's My Birthday

I made it to 25 without smoking, drinking, doing drugs, or having sex.
I guess this means I'm not normal.

Top Ten Best-Looking Cars of 2007

What is the ideal shape for a sports car? Almost since the automobile’s inception, automotive designers have experimented with a wide variety of shapes for sports cars; wedges, teardrops, blobs, cylinders, etc., resulting in a few iconic designs. Of course, volumes have been written on the topic, but in the end it just comes down to personal taste. Here are my choices for 2007.

10.		Porsche Cayman S Price: $49,400-$70,000 Horsepower: 245-295 Length: 170.9 in Weight: est 2950 With me in it: est 3115
	The Cayman is basically a hardtop version of the veteran Boxster roadster. It carries the trademark Porsche shape: long, low, sleek and aerodynamic, just a bit like its alligator-cousin namesake. I prefer it to the slightly larger 911, though it's a pretty close race.

9.		Ford Mustang Shelby GT500 Price: est $41,950 Horsepower: 500 Length: 187.6 in Weight: 3896
	American muscle doesn't get much better than this. The top-of-the-heap Mustang has a number of changes that add to its muscle-bound appearance, including a larger hood scoop, egg-crate grill, larger brakes, and some wicked fast racing stripes. Mine’s called Eleanor.

8.		Pontiac Solstice GXP Price: $25,995 Horsepower: 260 Length: 157.2 in Weight: 2995
	The Solstice was based on the formula for a purist's sports car: light, small, and fast. The result is the most exciting new GM entry in a long time, a true Mazda MX-5 competitor. The turbocharged GXP 2-liter inline-4 develops an impressive 260 horsepower. Also deserving of a nod in this category is the Solstice’s cousin, the Saturn Sky, a small, aggressive roadster with an ample dose of European styling.

7.		Mercedes-Benz SL Class Price: $95,575-$186-775 Horsepower: 382-604 Length: 178.5 Weight: 4220
	Mercedes' "small" roadster approaches my idea of the perfect-looking sports car, a precision machine that looks fun, but also looks very fast. It's a little out of my price range, but you have to admit, this car's got just about everything you could ask for in a sports car. The SL65 AMG is shown.

6.		Aston Martin V8 Vantage Price: $113,200 Horsepower: 380 Length: 172.5 in Weight: 3460
	Here's a car that looks like if you don't get out of the way it will eat you for breakfast. Any Aston Martin is guaranteed to make you feel like James Bond, but the V8 Vantage is the coolest of them all.

5.		Saleen S7 Twin Turbo Price: $602,000 Horsepower: 750 Length: 188.0 in Weight: 2950
	This car is so wild, you probably have to chain it up at night to keep it from roaming the neighborhood causing trouble. Just look at the claw-marks all over it. It's a beast. Check out those numbers.

4.		Lamborghini Murcielago LP640 Price: $300,000-$350,000 Horsepower: 640 Length: 180.3 in Weight: 4020
	A favorite of lotto winners and rap stars, Lamborghinis are cars you can depend on to boldly announce your status. The chiseled edges of the Murcielago LP640 contrast sharply with the elegant curves preferred by Ferrari designer, Pinanfarina. It is an iconic design that no other automotive designers have implemented with such rousing success.

3.		Chevrolet Corvette ZO6 Price: $65,000 Horsepower: 505 Length: 175.6 in Weight: 3180
	An American icon, the Chevrolet Corvette has always aspired to be the ideal sports car, a world-class performer at a bargain price. Each successive generation looks and performs better than the one before. The ZO6 is the most powerful stock 'Vette to date, with 505 bhp on tap.

2.		Infiniti G35 Coupe Price: $33,500-$36,000 Horsepower: 280-298 Length: 182.2 Weight: 3415
	With the discontinuation of the Acura RSX this year, this is my pick for best looks/price ratio. It’s basically a dressed-to-impress version of the Nissan 350Z (a great looking car as well), with a back seat added. The G35 represents the absolute hottest style Japan has to offer today. Get it in red.

1.		Ferrari 599 GTB Fiorano Price: est $250,000 Horsepower: 611 Length: 183.7 Weight: est 3720
	Ferrari’s latest flagship model is a true masterpiece of design and engineering, a shoo-in for first place on this list. Subtle details make all the difference, from the F1-style nose in front, muscular body sculpting, and roofline buttresses in the rear. I could go on and on, but you can read it for yourself.

		Acura RSX Type-S A-Spec Price: est $31,000 Horsepower: 201 Length: 172.4 Weight: est 2860
	One last hurrah for the Acura RSX. This is the car that I really wanted. The Type-S A-Spec comes equipped with underbody kit, 17" wheels, high wing spoiler, and autocross-ready suspension. But instead I opted for the more practical base model, with SportShift automatic transmission.

All photos copyright their respective owners.

"Crocodile Hunter" killed by stingray barb

Flamboyant daredevil zoologist Steve Irwin was killed early Monday while filming a documentary about stingrays off of Australia's Great Barrier Reef. He was swimming above one of the animals when its barb came up and pierced his heart. He was 44. Steve, the "Crocodile Hunter," was loved by millions around the world and was regarded as one of Australia's national treasures. He could get a state funeral if his family agrees.
In Pictures: Australia Mourns Irwin (BBC News)

Bob Dylan at Frontier Field

Yes, I was there last night. And I may post a "review" later, but there is actually quite a bit to say and I don't have time right now.